A Mans Guide To Proposing

Im a person that likes to research something in depth before I proceed; when cooking, traveling and when proposing was no exception.

I found the blogs that I read to be all generic, either follow tradition or buck tradition, nothing really resonated with me. Below is a blog from a groom to be, to the future groom to-be’s…..

Know you’re ready and get real.

Knowing you’re ready should be why you are reading this blog, don’t feel persuaded or feel that you have to propose because it’s “about time”. I actually sat my partner down at the start of the year and said where are we going, are we doing this or are we saying goodbye?  It wasn’t that I didn’t love her, it’s that I loved her too much to waste time staying still. After discussing that she was on the same page I decided that I would propose and I felt different, almost like our life together has only just begun??!!

Get to know her style

If you are a blokey bloke you probably wouldn’t know the difference between diamond cuts or ring styles so I suggest you get researching and probably open a beer because shit’s about to get real. It also helps to have a few females in the loop and males that have went through an engagement before are a great help too. Ask her questions on the sly, I always stopped when walking past jewellers and pretended to have a melt down over the price of rings then I would ask what type she would prefer and point to the ones I would like.  Have a look on instagram at #engagementrings  and pinterest and see what other people are wearing and ask the token friend or family what you think she would like.

Custom made engagement ring

Through secret questionnaires that she was completely blind to (winning) I found out 3 important things: The style, the colour and the size. I knew already that I wasn’t going to choose one off the shelf because that’s not me, I spoke to her mum about using a brooch stone that she used to wear so she would always have a piece of her mum with her (she’s a mums girl). I sent out an email to 4 jewellers and 2 of them replied almost instantly. Im a personality man and I was looking for guidance through this whole thing, Susie from Kennett Jewellers on Colombo street in Christchurch were 10000% more caring than anyone I could have imagined through this process.  They walked me through the design, price and making the ring – use them if you get the chance!

Quick tip..

Screen shot your favourite rings and send in an email to a jeweller with your budget, they will tell you what they can achieve for your price.

You will have to make a decision on the metal also, Gold, White gold or Platinum.  I chose platinum because it doesn’t have to be rhodium coated every 1-2 years to keep its hardness + Platinum is bad arse (but expensive)!

Say goodbye to your social life for a few months

I was lucky enough to make payments while the ring was being made but I recommend having the money to pay for the ring in full before you propose. Just be mindful of not being too obvious that you are going without haha – girls pick up on these things.

Plan the proposal

Now that I had the ring being made I got planning (if you are buying the ring from the shelf – don’t pick it up until this plan is complete). You honestly don’t know how special a proposal is until it happens and especially for her in time to come when she gets swarmed by every female that sees the sparkle, it’s like they are Keas haha.

3 key parts to a proposal 

Location, celebration afterwards, announcement

You need to be comfortable wherever you choose, she needs to think that its just a nice walk, a fancy restaurant or a bloody great hot air balloon ride (however you decide to do it). I knew my location and stalked the hell out of people pictures on Instagram so I can get a good feel for the best place to do it. You can plan a speech but honestly I don’t even know what I said there was so much emotion hahaha. Play it by the book, get down on one knee and take your time.

Also you need to think about if it is outside the weather may go south, is this okay and if it isn’t – where will your plan B be?  Because I had a few months to think about the proposal before I actually did I had already planned how I wanted to announce it also (provided Georgia was happy too) this is really important to think about because people get involved haha be mindful of no one but your selfs. People will always be offended you didn’t tell them first etc – so I just decided to put a picture of the ring on social media and basically say – she said yes!!!

Insure the ring 

Most important part here guys – get that puppy insured!

I didn’t even think of this, it was Kennetts that said to me that they will keep it in their safe until I had it insured haha, get it valued by the jeweller and call your insurance company to get it insured. Get it insured at the price to replace it NEW so you don’t lose money should something happen to the ring.

Propose 

I chose Aoraki/Mount Cook, it’s important that you feel 100% comfortable at the time, I am a photography wannabe and this in my view is one of the most beautiful places in the world. We walked the Hooker Valley track in the snow on a clear, sunny day. I knew that my camera would hide my nerves as I had the ring box safely tucked away in my bag. As we walked to the glacial lake I was taking in things like the amount of people around, the landscape around and the colour of the swing bridges because I wanted to dummy a photo of her facing away from me while I proposed and quickly snap a picture of the ring in my hand before she turned around.

When we finished the walk we were lucky enough to tie it in with a family weekend away in Tekapo and were treated to a chopper ride following, this was soooo nice to be able to share it just hours later with her family, she was so happy!

My biggest advice here is to really treasure the moment, don’t rush it and don’t compromise on having the best experience!

Engagement ring inspiration
Just before she realised I was proposing

Hooker Valley Track

Engagement Ring New Zealand

Mount Cook

Planning the engagement party – blog TBC …….